Wednesday 24 February 2010

I really couldn't decide whether to make my mind up or not...

So, with India looming and all the planning and decisions that inevitably comes with it baring down upon me, I have had the wonderful idea of taking on yet more thoughts into my already crammed mind.

I really don't know what it is about me that can never be satisfied and content with just one plan. Maybe it's Greed, or maybe it's Lust, lust for (I could easily go with Iggy Pop on this one...) the unseen delights the world has, possibly, got to offer me. Or maybe I'm just on one sardonic, narcissistic rampage to cover all the Deadly Sins in as little time as possible in the hope that no one will notice and.... judge. I seem to have gone off on rather a bizarre tangent which, I can assure you, has no relevance to anything.

Back to the point. I put a question to you, Bangladesh... first thoughts? Is it just as I imagine it to be, a country in constant recovery from one disaster to the next, poverty stricken and utterly destitute of any human comfort? Or, is it a country with an unimaginable struggle to free itself from this common conception. I just couldn't tell you the answer.

What I do know about it is this, it has 600,000 rickshaws or Tuk Tuks in Dhaka alone. I have experienced first hand the smothering effect they have on the City of Angels. You walk a hundred yards for a beer, you subsequently need a jack-hammer to remove the odious layer of grime covering your skin. That paints an awfully grotty picture of Dhaka and Bangladesh in my mind, one of which I need, and want, to wipe clean and re-paint.

So destination number three is, obviously, Bangladesh. For better or for worse I think it will certainly open my eyes and is therefore a worthwhile venture.

As if India isn't enough.

I think one of the things I adore most about life at present, is the prospect of life to come. Might not be the greatest way to live, but then, at present I have an infinite amount of life to look forward to. Certainly makes sense to me anyway.

Well enough's enough, I need to force my head into the darkest depths of the freezer compartment in a vain attempt to focus my mind on something a little more manageable.


Friday 19 February 2010

The beginning of a journey that's already begun.

Ok, so here we are. The start of something, a life, so undeniably wonderful and fragile it could never fully be put into words.

However, I am going to try none the less and if my writing turns out to be shit its entirely due to that aforementioned statement.

Right...

And so, I guess its come to that time where I need to give you a view of my life since my journey began. A long time ago.

So, where to start? I think I might do some sort of 'Memento'esk piece. Just to fuck with your head more than anything. Here goes....

My beer sits squarely between the legs of a teddy beside me. In my mind the bear's legs could be of 'insulatory' use to me and my beer.

I have been furiously cleaning my flat in order to get to this point. It has taken anger and pure stubbornness to achieve. But here we are.

A long time ago I sat on a waterfall with my friend Paul, we had purchased a small quantity of a local farmers 'secret crop'. Said 'secret crop' engaged us in conversation about life and our old group of friends, our time together growing up in Hastings. Some memories made me happy where others made me sad, for many reasons. But I've come to realise our collective boredom and discontent with Hastings actually created what (in retrospect) was an exceptionally good reason to push ourselves, in life and reach something greater.

Since that point on the waterfall I have travelled and explored my way through the sleepy capital of Laos, the dusty border towns of Cambodia, and extensively around Thailand.

Went to the Island of Phi Phi Don with Paul. He burnt me with his exceptional uncoordination on the fire skipping. And so on.

Time carried on as ever.

Ended up in a room with a friend called Rob for 4 months. Ups and downs. Lots of packeted MAMA noodles and boiled eggs (of which both involved being electrocuted by our metal kettle, still one has to eat, yes?).

Life expanded and contracted in direct relation to my mind and courage. A bit like time, which also passed. Slowly I might add. And so on.

Went to see if the Middle East could offer me more financial gain than the Far East. It couldn't. Although the food was a delight. Every cloud etc. It cost a lot to be out there. It still confuses me why I needed to pay so much to live in what is essentially, very expensive dust, everywhere. Still, who am I to judge which kind of dirt is worth living in.

Went back to the Far East. It proved a little more accommodating the second time round. I got a job teaching English in a Thai secondary school. Yes it really was as fulfilling as you might think... ish. Let's just say I feel like a lot of apologies are due to a lot of people within the educational period of life. I eventually got moved from that school as I didn't have any qualifications (I failed to mention that to them initially). The company I worked for decided to move me to a new school. I lasted all of 45 minutes at said school. A German sex tourist worked there, my only would be companion. The overwhelming direness of the whole situation convinced me to bravely sneak out during the King's National Anthem.

By now I'm not so far from being re-united with my beer of the literary future. Just a bit of drunken misconduct in-between. Oh and 4 months at a really lovely primary school (of which currently I am still employed, they don't have the National Anthem played so I guess it left me no choice but to stay, right?).

So, with a lot of planning and a small amount of thinking I now have plans, I won't say they're set in stone, more a kind of mud. I plan to achieve one of my life long dreams by visiting Angkor Wat in Cambodia at the beginning of March. Then I'm off to India on the 13th to see some different dirt and an awful lot of curry. In 4 weeks I will be drinking a steaming, self-absorbent, cup of Chai tea watching the sun rise over Mt Everest. I think it could possibly be considered a high point in my story of life so far, literally and psychologically.

Almost back with my beer...

Well, I have written this to a soundtrack of 'Blond on Blond' by a Mr Bob Dylan. I would suggest finding a suitable selection of music to read this to as I believe it's the only way I'll ever get back to my beer. Although on further reflection I think that last sentence may have had more significance being written slightly nearer the start of this literary journey. Still, mustn't mess with fate, I'm sure there was a reason I put it here.

And so on.

P.S. The photo at the top is the building of which I am currently drinking said beer. It's a Beer Leo.